18 Things That St. Louis Stubbornly Insists on Calling By the Wrong Name

By Jaime Lees on Sat, Mar 17, 2018 at 4:27 am

St. Louis has its own language. It's very easy for us to tell if you are not from the area if you can't follow our specific cultural clues. In addition to our vowel-twisting accents, you must also learn our words if you want to fit in and not be immediately exposed as an outsider.

Once you've studied our ways, this sentence will make complete sense to you: "I left my house in the Grove on the way to Riverport and made a stop in Dogtown near where they had the Checkerdome. But once I got on 40 and realized that I was going to have to put up with all of those hoosiers there, I decided that I'd better grab some food first from the Bread Co. So I got a soda and some fancy version of muskacholi." Read on for eighteen things that you have to speak St. Louis to understand.

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Riverport

Our large outdoor ampitheatre hasn't been named "Riverport" in sixteen years. After it changed to the infuriatingly named "UMB Bank Pavillion" (that's "United Missouri Bank Bank Pavillion"), it was Verizon Wireless Ampitheatre before it became Hollywood Casino Ampitheatre. Whatever. It will always be Riverport to us.

Photo courtesy of RFT

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Highway 40

There is only one acceptable name for this stretch of highway and that is "Highway 40." The number stuck around after the road was absorbed into the Interstate system. The rest of the world might call this road Interstate 64 (hell, they even call it that in Illinois just over the river), but a true St. Louisan only says Highway 40. Say it with the honking, vowel-defying regional accent ("Highway Farty") for bonus points.

Photo courtesy of Paul Sableman / Flickr

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Dogtown

The Dogtown neighborhood is famous as the place in St. Louis where the big St. Patrick's Day parade happens every year. Dogtown also doesn't exist. The area that we call Dogtown is actually five separate neighborhoods. (Clayton-Tamm, Franz Park, Hi-Pointe, Cheltenham and part of Ellendale.) You won't find it on any proper map. Weird, huh?

Photo courtesy of Jon Gitchoff

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The Kiel/Scottrade/Savvis/Enterprise Whatever

Can just one of our sports areas please keep a static name? This place started as Kiel Center, then became Savvis Center and is now the Scottrade Center. TD Ameritrade recently purchased Scottrade, so we anticipated yet another name change, but TD Ameritrade was smart and said they don't have any current plans to change the name. Good, because we can never remember the first names, anyway.

Photo courtesy of Herkie / Flickr

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Shaw's Garden

We natives always call the Missouri Botanical Garden "Shaw's Garden" after its founder, Henry Shaw. Apparently we're all really tight with the noted philanthropist because we say Shaw's Garden like we know the dude and it's just his back yard.

Photo courtesy of Missouri Botanical Garden

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The Dome

It's real full name now is The Dome at America's Center, but this place has suffered from the same ailment as Riverport: too many names. It started as the Trans World dome and then became the Edward Jones Dome and ugh. Exhausting. Most residents just call it That Ugly Place Where The Rams Always Lost That Now Hosts Supercross Events.

Photo courtesy of Thomas Gehrke / Flickr

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Hoosier

To the rest of the country, "hoosier" is a nickname for a person from Indiana. But in the Lou, hoosier is a word that's used as a synonym for white trash. The origin of this particular usage is unclear, but one thing is for sure, you don't want to be called a hoosier in St. Louis.

Photo courtesy of Google Maps

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"Muskacholi"

This pasta's real name is mostaccioli but nobody in St. Louis seems to know that. It's so accepted that you can even order "muskacholi" on the Hill and not get smacked across the face. It's not a matter of odd Midwestern pronunciation; most people have no idea that this bastardization isn't the real word for it. They wouldn't care, either.

Photo courtesy of Kelly Glueck

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Pizza

In any other city, this means a delicious carbohydrate entree that is circular and covered in sauce, cheeses and meats. In St. Louis it means a toasted cracker with sugary sauce and plasticky Provel. If somebody here says "pizza" they mean "St. Louis style pizza." It is the default. All other pizzas are given a regional distinction like New York style or Chicago style.

Photo courtesy of Liza Lagman Sperl / Flickr

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The Arch

Yep. Y'all call the damn symbol of your city by the wrong name. It's really the Gateway Arch, but nobody has ever said that in the history of Missouri. Until recently, the grounds it stood on were called the Jefferson National Expansion Memorial, which would've been a mouthful if any human had ever said it. That area is now called the Gateway Arch National Park.

Photo courtesy of John Sonderman / Flickr

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The Grove

This neighborhood was given that nickname when they were trying to make it into an entertainment district. Before this happened the area had been anchored by gay bars and everybody in town just called it the "gayborhood." This area's real name is Forest Park Southeast. (And some of Botanical Heights is considered "The Grove," too.) Now you know the truth.

Photo courtesy of Ed Aller

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The Old Barn

This place was torn down in 1999 and we still somehow manage to use two wrong names for it. Its real name was the St. Louis Arena but darn near everybody called it the Checkerdome or the Old Barn. Those names are still used to reference the area where the building was located. Q: "Yo, where's the closest Jimmy John's?" A: "There's one over where the Old Barn was."

Photo courtesy of Philip Leara / Flickr

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Toasted Ravioli

You knew that this was a uniquely St. Louis food, but did you know that these things aren't really toasted raviolis? They're fried. This city is full of lies, all lies. Also, you probably don’t even call them toasted ravioli, you call them t-ravs, don’t you? Thought so.

Photo courtesy of Mabel Suen

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Soda

In St. Louis if you ask for a soda, you'll likely be asked what kind. By that they mean what brand because we call all of those sugary carbonated beverages "soda." In other cities if you as for a soda, you'll be given a club soda. Some cities call all sodas "cokes" which is especially weird because Coke is an actual brand. Other places say pop and that makes the most sense, but it still sounds weird, if you ask us.

Photo courtesy of Mabel Suen

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Steak

When summer comes around and St. Louisans say that they're going to put some steaks on the grill... they mean pork steaks. It's just a St. Louis thing. If they mean steaks from cows they will say beef steaks because pork steaks are the default. Don’t question us.

Photo courtesy of Barzan ATTILA / Shutterstock

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The Boat

The state of Missouri approved gambling on the water in 1992. (This was also the open window for "boats in moats.") So for a while if you were in St. Louis and you were going gambling, you were "going to the boat." The phrase stuck and is now frequently used whenever we're going to any casino in general.

Photo courtesy of Wally Hartshorn / Flickr

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Bread Co.

The business started here and was originally named the St. Louis Bread Company. When Au Bon Pain bought the company in 1997, they renamed it Panera in all locations except for the ones in the metro area. The rest of the world calls it Panera, but we're still over here calling it the St. Louis Bread Company. Well, not really. Locals usually just call it "Bread Co."

Photo courtesy of MichaelFranks6 / Flickr

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Trolley

St. Louis has a rapidly evolving meaning for the word "trolley." It started out as a cutesy version of "streetcar," but instead it's become a synonym for boondoggle. Why do St. Louisans say "trolley" when they mean something is frustrating or very expensive or bad for business? Darned if we know. But many a St. Louisans has been known to throw their hands up and exclaim "This is such a trolley situation!" before walking out of the room. True fact.

Photo courtesy of Sarah Fenske

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18 Things That St. Louis Stubbornly Insists on Calling By the Wrong Name

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